When You’re Craving Your Couch
You have a To Do list a mile long and all you want to do is hole up on the couch.
Another night goes by. You haven’t crossed anything off your to do list. The laundry’s still there. You haven’t sent holiday thank you notes, and the last time you went to the doctor… ahem….
Somewhere between brushing your teeth and laying your head on the pillow, shame sets in.
“I’ll just do it all tomorrow,” you think to yourself.
Problem: you’re craving the couch. You want hot tea + a glass of wine + a really good book. But when you give in to that craving, all you hear is the chorus of Shoulds, Musts, and my personal favorite: Have-To’s. It feels terrible, so you keep avoiding everything you said you were going to do.
Listen, January is the time we’re supposed to lose 10 pounds, get control of our financial life once and for all, and meet the partner of our dreams.
Want to get up to big things, big goals, cray-cray dreams? Yasss, woman. Me too!
But the way that our society does life doesn’t always work for me. Not in January. Not during this cold.
Creating the life I most want to live takes serious energy, serious love, and serious discipline. Along with my new pledge to BodyPump + yoga, I need less doing so I can create that life.
If you’re craving the couch, please listen to those cravings. They are telling you what you need for the months to come. Here’s what those cravings for cozying up point to:
1) Your roots need nutrients
Winter is not a time that you see things blossoming. Winter is a time for slowing down. Going deep. Resting with what is. To me, that means staying home. Curling up on the couch with my dreams, my books, my imagination, my girlfriends + the dudes I love, drinking wine, guzzling tea, laughing, writing etc.
It is a TIME FOR ROOTS, sister-friend, and going deep. Winter is not the time for a growth explosion. This is not the time for doing a billion + 4 things. How are you letting your roots run deep for their nutrients right now? What do you need permission to NOT DO, so that you can take the time that’s necessary for big spring blossoms?
2) Garner your energy
Ever pushed a boulder up hill? ME NEITHER (Thank god for trucks)! What an amazing invention. If you are planning to push a boulder up hill (examples may include taking an international trip, moving, making a career jump, breaking up, etc.), you have to build up youer energy first. You literally collect energy. If you move too soon, before you have the strength, before you have all the energy you need, you might not have enough steam to get up over the hill. You gotta train for it.
There’s a tension when we know that movement is coming, when there’s something that we want to do, but we just don’t know what it is or the time isn’t right. We’ve all met the dude where the timing was just off. Bummer. What are you getting excited about? Notice THAT.
3) Use this time to dream & scheme
Dreaming and scheming is the stage before doing, according to brilliant life coach Martha Beck. Sitting on your couch writing out your dreams, talking with your girlfriends about your next career change, that is the work. Let the energy build. Dream on it. Set yourself up with time to scheme. Let it all come up.
Release the chorus of Shoulds, Musts, and Have-To’s right now in service of an even bigger push that’s coming in a few weeks or months.
Garner your energy, love. Permission granted for couch + snuggle time.
And wait – how will you know when it’s time to take action?
You’ll feel it. Hear me out – when you have enough energy, you’re going to be wildly excited. You’ll want to move.
You’re whole body is going to want to get up, up, up.
I promise that you can’t miss it, because just in case you’re in danger of missing it: guilt + discomfort + fear will be banging down the door. Let them. They are just signs saying that the energy is ready to be used. And if you’ve been indulging in couch time, if you’ve been chatting it up with your loved ones + new friends, if you’ve been writing it out, you’re going to know it’s time.
Jessica Leigh Lyons is a seeker & facilitator of joy with young professionals and one of Bossed Up’s featured Bootcamp Trainers. She is a Certified Life Coach through the International Coaching Academy and holds a masters degree in education from the University of Colorado, Denver as well as a bachelor of arts in international relations from the University of Delaware. With a decade of varied experience teaching & leading youth in a multitude of learning modalities, she has been coaching young professionals since 2013. For more details, connect with her here on her website.
Jessica Leigh Lyons is a seeker & facilitator of joy with young professionals and one of Bossed Up’s featured Bootcamp Trainers. She is a Certified Life Coach through the International Coaching Academy and holds a masters degree in education from the University of Colorado, Denver as well as a bachelor of arts in international relations from the University of Delaware. With a decade of varied experience teaching & leading youth in a multitude of learning modalities, she has been coaching young professionals since 2013.